When you get what you want, but not what you need.

“When you try your best but you don’t succeed. When you get what you want but not what you need. When you feel so tired but you can’t sleep. Stuck in reverse” – Coldplay.

CONDITION OF READING! GO TO YOUTUBE, TYPE IN FIX YOU BY COLDPLAY, HIT PLAT AND THEN COME BACK AND READ!

Trying to change someone when you can’t. Not because you don’t love them to absolute pieces but just because for that moment you needed them to be someone different. Why? Just because. But let’s be honest,  you can’t and as much you think you can try, people will not change. They are who they are for a reason and to those out there who are trying to change themselves for someone else, well unless you need to for yourself, then don’t. End of story. What i think i’m trying to say is that i think we’re all spending too much of our lives trying to be someone different to fit in with someone else. It could be throughout school, through a relationship, through a friendship and so on. It’s funny isn’t it. We all go on about being individuals but at the end of the day, we want to be exactly like someone else. I’m guilty. You’re guilty and together, we’re guilty of the very same thing. I know personally that i have many people, but a few individuals in particular that i look at and admire more than i can put down on this page. They are the apple to my eye for so many reasons. It ranges from the simple things like them knowing how your feeling in certain situations, to them having the ability to make you smile to other things like their achievements such as where they might be at in their career and so on. Realistically, it’s not that you want to be exactly like them but it’s to the point where you feel like you need to study them to find every single loop hole of how they got to where they are. I call these ones my guardian angels. These ones are the biggest part of my life and even though they may not be aware, they are leading me to where i need to go. They’re my GPS. So why would anyone want to change someone so unbelievably outstanding? How could anyone hurt these people? To the ones that have, may you get what’s coming to you. To the people who are reading this who have been hurt by someone so close, well my heart will ache every day until your pain is relieved. To the people who are reading this who have used both hands to tear some ones heart out, well who knows what your situation could have been, but i hope your reasoning is a good one. Who knows, one day i may be a culprit. One day i know i will be. I will reflect pain upon the people i love the most, more than the world. I guess that’s just what happens. You can’t get away with not hurting someone, never. It’s shit i think. Because you can’t not hurt someone. Sometimes you have to. Sometimes they’re ripped away from you in a split second and other times you have no other choice but to let them walk away. It’s a lose lose situation sometimes.

Some of you may be trying to figure out what i’m feeling when i write this and to be honest, i don’t know what i feel at all. My fingers are taking you on this journey so ask them because i have no idea. What i do know is that every day i try and grasp the concept of how important people are, how each role you play in some ones life is a thousand times bigger than you think and how we should take into account that within seconds the ones we love may not be there to pick you up when you fall down.